I’m sure he’s just living with his mother until his thrash metal career takes off…
What’s the one thing that can bring me out of mothballs? Bad Television.
Welcome to the 2012 Fall Television Dead Pool
As in years past, we here at EJSIC take our vast knowledge of pop culture – television in particular – and pit it against each other and our reader(s). We single out the new network show that we think will get canceled first. And whoever’s show gets the hook first, wins. Simple. Last year’s crop of freshman shows was stubborn, but, in the end, natural selection took over and most of them met their end. Though, a few didn’t…for some reason.
Anyway, last year’s winning victim, The Playboy Club, eventually shuffled off and less than half of the remaining new shows followed. Less than half? We can do better, folks. This year, I am calling for a 100% success rate in new show fatalities.
Yes we can! Yes we can!
A reminder of the rules: simply choose, IN THE COMMENTS SECTION, which new fall network show you think is going to get canceled first. The person who selects the show that is axed first will receive a prize of undecided worth and/or existence. The author will wait until 5 picks have been made before choosing his pick.
Choose well, jerks. Choose well.
(click the shows to learn more about them)
4) 666 Park Avenue (ABC)
2) Animal Practice (NBC) Shiffus77
- Arrow (CW)
- Beauty and the Beast (CW)
Ben and Kate (FOX) crazyqx
- Chicago Fire (NBC)
- Elementary (CBS) capnwacky
Emily Owens M.D. (CW) Yoda
Go On (NBC) bucksfan92
Guys With Kids (NBC) Chuck_Norrisaurus
4) Last Resort (ABC) buergermeister
1) Made in Jersey (CBS) rockchalk010*
Malibu Country (ABC)
- Nashville (ABC)
3) Partners (CBS) Flop
- The Mindy Project (FOX) GodzillaBJ
The Mob Doctor (FOX) shocker11
- The Neighbors (ABC) Azcats1993
- Revolution (NBC) brentton32
DISCLAIMER: Only new shows on network stations are included. No cable shows, for obvious reasons. Also, reality shows are not included, because it is typically impossible to cancel a reality show mid-season. Once all shows are picked, selection will be closed. If a show goes unpicked, but is canceled, the game continues until a show that has been picked gets canceled. Also, only shows that have set premiere dates are included. There are many more terrible shows slated for mid-season starts or replacement. If you want to risk it and choose one of those, be our guest.
* – Winner 10/10/12
While the week before the Final Four drags on like a Streisand convention (think about it a second), please enjoy this commercial about getting your holes filled.
Do the right thing. Make Pop-Pop proud.
See more illustrations from the artist here.
Enough football? Let’s mock some television shows!
This is one of my very favorite times of the year. Not only do beloved shows return from summer-long hiatuses…hiati(?)…breaks, but, most importantly, network execs give turning buckets of crap into gold one more shot.
Welcome to the 2011 Fall Television Dead Pool
A staggering, if not unsurprising, 74% of last year’s new network shows never made it to that “sure, go ahead and start production on Season 2″ threshold. Hell, most of them didn’t even make it to that “keep craft services around for another couple of weeks, just in case” point in the life of a TV show. So, what did the horribleness of last year’s crop of shows teach those brilliant minds who greenlight projects? As you are about to find out, not much.
I’ve done some research this year that will hopefully eliminate the recurring problem of picking, say, a Love Bites to be the first show canceled only to have it air as a late season replacement (where it was promptly canceled) long after the first shows are laid to rest, thus voiding whoever picked it’s chances of winning the pool. Unfortunately, that means that none of us get to pick, what could easily be the worst show in recent memory, ABC’s Work It…which isn’t scheduled to ruin humanity until midseason. For these same reasons, Apartment 23, Scandal, The River, The Finder, Once Upon A Time, I Hate My Teenage Daughter, Napoleon Dynamite (!?), Alcatraz and Good Christian
Bitches Belles are also not included in the poola. Likewise, the good folks at FOX tend to hold off on some show debuts until October/early November. So, bear that in mind when choosing. But, fear not, there are still plenty of “good” picks to choose from. Continue reading