Kansas Jayhawks Will Not Be Playing Connecticut on an Aircraft Carrier; Focused on Deal With the U.S. Air Force

LAWRENCE, KS – Officials at the University of Kansas have killed the rumor that the Jayhawks would be playing a basketball game on an aircraft carrier against the UConn Huskies in 2012.  Connecticut officials are still looking to find an opponent for the 2nd Carrier Classic.

The 2011 edition of the Classic featuring Michigan State and North Carolina, has been a long discussed possibility that finally became reality this summer.

The college basketball world is understandably thrilled about the upcoming spectacle and all that maritime-based basketball could mean for the future of the sport.  So, why would KU not want to participate in such a special event?

“We just don’t feel it’s right for us to commit to the Carrier Classic at this time when we have other deals in the works,” Kansas Athletic Director, Sheahon Zenger said in an interview.  When asked to which other deals he was referring, he smiled coyly and said “I believe you know the answer to that.”

Indeed, buzz has been hot about the possibility of the Jayhawks starting their own classic series…on the wings of a modified C-17 cargo jet.

Aerial Allen Fieldhouse?

Details are still fuzzy, but it is believed that a custom-made court will be affixed to the top of the wing span of the military grade transport aircraft.

NCAA officials work to secure a prototype basket on a C-17 at Edwards AFB in California

The game would then be played while the jet ran low-altitude maneuvers over the Nevada desert.  Zenger hopes to have an opponent announced by next spring.

“It’s an exciting time for college basketball and American military vehicles, ” Zenger said. “Who knows what kind of possibilities for sport/war machine partnership are out there?”

Only time will tell if he is right.

 

298*

Every good record needs an * beside it these days. Brett Favre is no exception.

The Mississippi diva gets an extra day of rest before mustering the heroic strength to start yet another game. The NFL and mother nature, where would Favre be without either?

EDITOR’S NOTE: The writer of this article is predicting Brett Favre will start tonight for the Minnesota Vikings. Do not use this uneducated guess for anything more than what it was intended – a guess.

Hahahahahaha RE: Ole Miss

This comes via the Facebook page of our friends at Sports Xtra in Nashville (AM 560) via TMZ. It appears the University of Mississippi, better known as Ole Miss, may be replacing beloved sideline mascot Colonel Reb with Admiral Ackbar, the Commander of the Rebel Alliance in Star Wars.

First, hahahahahahahaha. Second, WTF? Growing up an hour north of Oxford, I would’ve never predicted this in a million years. Ole Miss has always displayed the values of the old South and this is so non-South that it seems to come only from left field.

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This just screams, "Go Rebels!" doesn't it?

I can’t imagine too many happy tailgaters sitting in the grove slapping high-fives with this mutated bass fish abomination. But, whatever gives you a 21st century appeal. That’s what the administration wants, after all. They want to distance themselves from the problems throughout the history of the South and this definitely does it.

Hotty Toddy, gosh almighty, when is that ever going to scare somebody?

Baseball Admits Playoff Scheduling Part of Pity Marketing Strategy

Bud Selig tries desperately to ignore a question at today's announcement.

Bud Selig tries desperately to ignore a question at today's announcement.

In a shocking move today, Major League Baseball Interim Commissioner for life Bud Selig announced that the bizarre scheduling of this year’s Playoffs was not merely blatant ineptness as most observers believed, but part of a marketing strategy aimed at making NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman seem marginally less inept.

”Gary and I have been friends for a long time,” Selig said today. “We have had a number of long discussions about how frustrating it is running the most obscure ‘major’ sport in North America and this is sort of what we came up with.”

When discussions first arose between Selig and Bettman about how to make “America’s Pastime” more obscure than hockey, even Selig wasn’t sure it would be possible.

“It was right after 1998,” Selig said. “We had just had the big home run chase. People were flocking to ballparks. And everybody on Earth knew the names of our big stars. I told Gary I wanted to help, but that it might not be possible.”

The key to the plan, it turns out, was to OVER-expose the league. Major League Baseball managed to get six games a week on ESPN. It seemed baseball was about to boom, but exactly the opposite happened.

“Once people really saw how horrible our product was, especially when we had to clean up the steroids, the slide was almost inevitable,” Selig said.

But as fewer and fewer fans watched baseball on TV, the one part of the season that seemed difficult to kill was the Playoffs.

“It’s just like any other sport,” Selig explained, “especially ones like ours with an insufferably long, nearly meaningless regular season; people tend to tune back in for the Playoffs in big numbers. And with our ridiculous economic structure that ensures that the teams from the biggest cities make the Playoffs, we knew it would be hard to get people to quit watching.” Continue reading