Luke Warm Linkage

New crunchy bread: it’s not for everyone.

EJSIC Post of the Year Voting Continues

Don’t forget to vote for the EJSIC Post of the Year. Here are the nominations:

“NCAA Tournament Thrown Into Chaos as Committee Chair Recognizes Error”
By Nomore Toys

“1,001 Things Not To Do: Justice Not So Blind in Bangkok”
By Aspiring Deadbeat Dad

“Sneak Preview: Sean Salisbury’s ESPN Tell-All”
By Small Arms McGee

“How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love the Couch”
By Don Burgundy

“The Second Law of Thermodynamics and Me”
By Al Kenmore

“The Results Are In… And Autumn Wins”
By Foul Balls

“I Have Been Experienced: Chapter 29″
By Jose Kortez

“Drew Carey ‘Pretty Damn Tired of Being Confused with Louie Anderson’”
By Shred Torn

“Kanye West: The Voice of a Generation”
By Stimulus Package

“Samurai of the Week: Michelle Beadle”
By The Sensei

“Beer Packaging Finally Perfected”
By Vagabond Joe

“Scientists Discover the Coldest Place in the Universe”
By Michael Street

“John Calipari Recruiting Muhammad Ali”
By Flop

Vote here:

The winner will be decided Friday. Good luck to all our writers.

Luke Warm Linkage

It could have happened.

Fall Television Dead Pool Update

Well, the axe has fallen…

A few weeks ago, we unveiled our first annual Fall Television Dead Pool.  Readers and Jerks alike made their picks of which new TV show would get canceled first.

And we have a winner.

FOX has officially canceled the critically-liked, but viewer-deficient Lone Star.

Sometimes the networks get it right. Sometimes....

So, congratulation to elmo.  Once we figure out what your prize is, it will be in the proverbial mail.

Keep those cancellations coming, America!

I’ve Been Experienced: Chapter 61

I Have Been Experienced, by Jose Kortez
Table of Contents
So, I’m fascinated by demeaning sexual acts. I’ve told you about the time I turned a girl into a zombie on accident. I love reading about Cleveland Steamers and things like that. I think it’s incredibly funny to read about, though I doubt anyone has tried this darker Kama Sutra found on the internet. But some of the moves, like the Zombie or a Dirty Sanchez are not totally out of the realm of reason. Even working a rodeo on a girl is funnier than it is insane.

Women always seemed surprised by my actions even when they had heard from friends what would happen.

Women always seemed surprised by my actions even when they had heard from friends what would happen.

I’ve had a few long term girlfriends who I’m completely open with sexually. And in those cases, I am ok with her doing whatever she wants and expect the same of her. If something I want is really crazy, I’ll run it past her before I try it. Other things, I’ll just do and if she has a problem with it, I figure it won’t be a deal breaker.

So, I dated a girl for two years at one point. She and I were both very open to all things sexual, so you can imagine that things got pretty wild, pretty often. We’d usually have sex a few times a day on weekend days when we had free time and when we saw each other during the week, if we weren’t too wiped out, we’d mess around then too. This was after we both had jobs and had realized the horror of being a professional – getting up really early and working 9 to 10 hours a day, which is painfully different than being a kid in college with some classes and homework. She had a desk job and I was tending the potato fields, but we’d both be exhausted upon getting home for the night.

She was really good about letting me watch the sports I like on Saturdays and during the summer, we’d usually do something outside since there are no good summer sports. In the winter, it’s college basketball, the fall is college football and even in the fall, I miss a lot of games to be outside. But by early April, I’m outside constantly. Being outside, especially in the summer along the East Coast is best done early in the morning, which really eats into sex time. But winter mornings were terrific because we had nothing else to do but fool around for a few hours before getting a beer and watching some basketball.

Continue reading

Luke Warm Linkage

There’s a reason all dreams don’t come true.

One Sentence Review: Fall 2010 Rookie TV Shows

In this new segment, Joe attempts to capture the basic feel for television shows, movies or music in one, brief and often-grammatically-disastrous sentence.   Here is his take on the 7 new fall shows he actually took time to suffer through.

The Event (NBC) – The search for America’s Next Lost continues…this time with aliens and/or mutants…probably.  C

Hawaii 5-0 (CBS) – An enjoyable, if not a bit too ambitious, rehash.  B-

Raising Hope (FOX) – Surprisingly witty and full, on the surface at least, of promise.  A

Running Wilde (FOX) – The word “disappointment” would be appropriate here if it weren’t for…well…nevermind, it’s exactly appropriate. D

Undercovers (NBC) – A non-threatening, throw-away of a show that will struggle to find a riveted audience. C+

Outsourced (NBC) – I don’t even need a full sentence when one word will suffice:  shitfest.  F

Hellcats (CW) – OMG, the rocker chick made the cheerleading squad!!!!  C-