I have been stumped for the past nine days. In the last phase of this search for a new NFL team for my wife to cheer for, I’ve been trying to weigh the appropriate pros and cons of the final four teams in order to come to an informed and guilt-free decision.
The Packers, while mostly harmless, have been successful as of late. So, there is a legit tendency to want to avoid bandwagonry at all costs. And Brett Favre played for them for half a century or something. So, it’s tough to love them. Then again, they were jilted by number 4. But, as has been stated, their fans wear cheese hats. So, who knows?
The Jets are still tempting. Mostly, because each time I mention them as a possibility around here, another of my Patriot-fan friend’s head explodes. Which is really, really fun to watch. However, Brett Favre played for them for half an hour or something. So, it’s tough to love them.
The Seattle Seahawks are still a great choice. But, the geography just doesn’t help. Are they even ON television outside of the Pacific Northwest? Would it be worse than being a fan of her native Rams? So many questions.
The Minnesota Vikings wear purple, which is a stupid, stupid color for a sports team. I generally like every person I have ever met from Minnesota, so, I could see my wife becoming one of those very nice people. But, Brett Favre played for them for a couple of seasons…so, man…how did I end up letting THREE teams that Favre played for make the final cut? See. This is why I shouldn’t be entrusted to such decisions.
Which is why I decided that I am not going to make this decision. I am turning to a higher power: our 11 month-old son.
Hey, it worked with an octopus…why not a baby?
So, without ado, we give you…
“The Decision II: The Revenge of the Crawling Deciderer”
So, there you have it. This long, drawn-out process is complete. For the next 4 or so months, my wife is a Minnesota Vikings fan.
My apologies to the other finalists.
May God have mercy on us all.