Last week, the country became captivated by Balloon Boy, six year-old Falcon Heene, whose parents started a national panic when they reported to authorities that he had climbed into their Zeppelin-like balloon and sailed away into the Colorado sky. News stations around the country were fixated on the boys story, people watching at home hoped and prayed he would be okay. Then the report came, little Falcon was alive and well, hiding in a box in the attic of the house. What a little jerk.

Bike Boy > Balloon Boy

That’s not even the worst part of the story.

Days later, the family went on Larry King Live where little Falcon let the secret slip, “You guys said we did this for show.” Kids say the darnedest things, don’t they? Now, the parents will probably have charges filed against them.

What lesson should we all take away from this? Well there are a few:

1. Keep your kids on a leash, even when in your home. If you don’t want to hang onto the leash then just put the loop over a door knob.
2. Kids are to be seen, not heard.
3. When searching a house, look in the attic.
4. Use your logical thought process. Did you see that balloon? Could it really have lifted a child that high, or at all?