This is one of my very favorite times of the year. Not only do beloved shows return from summer-long hiatuses…hiati(?)…breaks, but, most importantly, network execs give turning buckets of crap into gold one more shot.

Welcome to the 2011 Fall Television Dead Pool

A staggering, if not unsurprising, 74% of last year’s new network shows never made it to that “sure, go ahead and start production on Season 2″ threshold.  Hell, most of them didn’t even make it to that “keep craft services around for another couple of weeks, just in case” point in the life of a TV show.  So, what did the horribleness of last year’s crop of shows teach those brilliant minds who greenlight projects?  As you are about to find out, not much.

I’ve done some research this year that will hopefully eliminate the recurring problem of picking, say, a Love Bites to be the first show canceled only to have it air as a late season replacement (where it was promptly canceled) long after the first shows are laid to rest, thus voiding whoever picked it’s chances of winning the pool.  Unfortunately, that means that none of us get to pick, what could easily be the worst show in recent memory, ABC’s Work It…which isn’t scheduled to ruin humanity until midseason.  For these same reasons, Apartment 23, Scandal, The River, The Finder, Once Upon A Time,  I Hate My Teenage Daughter, Napoleon Dynamite (!?), Alcatraz and Good Christian Bitches Belles are also not included in the pool^a.  Likewise, the good folks at FOX tend to hold off on some show debuts until October/early November.  So, bear that in mind when choosing.  But, fear not, there are still plenty of “good” picks to choose from. Continue reading →