Turns out this is not a safe place to store your cell phone.

• Matt Garza threw the first no-hitter in Rays history last night, but it was the 5th no-no this season. Considering the fact that we were also one blown call away from 3 perfect games, this has to be one of the most dominant pitching years in MLB history.
• The Titans are suing Lane Kiffin and USC for the improper hiring of new OC Kennedy Pola. I bet Volunteer fans are crushed to hear this.
• It turns out that Pitino extortionist Karen Sypher uses blowjobs as currency. No wonder she expected Rick to pay so much for restaurant penetration.
• Everyone’s favorite Paraguayan mobile boob deployment device was robbed in Rio. She lost her phone and her passport, but thankfully she held on to her most important assets.
• The 9 hottest female former child stars. I emphasize the word “former”.
• Inception: The info-graphic. If the movie is as complicated as this graphic, I may be in trouble.
• Finally, 100% accurate field sobriety tests: