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I spent 5 years in college because it really is a great time. So great that after college, I went to a new college for a Masters. And after some time in the real world, I went back to the Greatest Place on Earth for a PhD. God knows, the reason I love college so much is because of the hot, young tail.
I’m not even attractive, but girls between the ages of 18 and 22 are stupid. So stupid that they don’t realize that by sleeping with me, they are in no way setting themselves up to date me. They are, however, providing me with stories to later spread around the internet to encourage a younger, more capable generation of unattractive men to treat them with essentially no respect and do things with them that would make porn stars blush.
One of the things that happens when you put a group of blatantly immature men in close proximity with ignorantly immature women and no adult chaperones is terrible decisions. One of my favorite mainstays, and admittedly terrible decisions, from college was “taking a break.” I was constantly taking breaks from the girls I was dating, only to make up after a wild night.
When you decide you need a break, it’s usually planned and usually immediately before you know you’re going to do something that would get you in so much trouble it would ruin your relationship that currently affords you all the no-strings-attached sex you want. Well, round about sophomore year, I was on a break…