I’m this close to owning one of these.

• Tom Brady threw for 517 yards and 4 TD’s, as the Patriots dominated the Dolphins in Madden 98 fashion. This just in… The Broncos still suck.
• Did Terrell Pryor sell out his former teammates to curry favor with the NFL? Probably.
• Manny Ramirez has been arrested for domestic violence in Florida. Includes a commemorative Manny being Manny mug shot.
• Ron Jaworski said “shit” on MNF and awkwardly apologized to America.
• The nation commemorated the 10th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks by raising a glass to the stable democracy of Afghanistan and to a decade of unprecedented peace and prosperity across the globe. Where’s a victory banner when you need one?
• A ten year old boy has decided he’d prefer to go back to school as a girl. At least he’s clearing up the confusion before high school.
• 6 companies that are clearly catering to super villains. I’d like an underground lair on my private island staffed with a private army of super-models. Make it happen.
• Trick shots with the Great One.