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So, I have been caught fooling around or having sex with a lot of girls. A lot. Certainly more times than I’ve been arrested or had run ins with the cops. And I really can’t express how much I enjoy a good awkward encounter, so much so that I may even subconsciously have sex in places where I’m likely to get caught. Other times, if the choice comes down to having sex in front of someone or not having sex at all, I’m going to have sex and the other person in the room can either choose to watch or choose to leave.
In the summer after my junior year of college, Bones took an internship in New Jersey. At this point in my life, I was sure that the worst part of the United States was New Jersey. This is why being experienced is a good thing. Because later in my life I would find Albuquerque and realize that New Jersey is still America’s anus, but Albuquerque is like a festering, smelly pustule that America should see a doctor about.
Anyway, Bones called me and Evil Twin to let us know that their internship was over and they were throwing a huge party to say goodbye to the friends they had made during the summer. So, it was going to be the interns and all of their friends. Evil Twin and I knew that while NJ was a long freaking drive, there was no way we were missing this party. I’m not a planner, I just do things and hope they work out. But for this trip we planned everything out so it would run as smoothly as possible. It was going to be one very long day on the road to get from our school to the Jersey shore.
We decided we’d need enough gas money to get there and back, money for a campground or something, and we should bring two cases of beer just to be sure there was enough. And we were both pretty much broke, so this was going to be financially painful – we had to take a few days off of work, spend money we didn’t have, and all in the name of drinking with a friend we drank with at least once a week back at school.
So why go? Because simply changing scenes and doing the same thing almost always leads to an awesome night. I don’t know what it is – whether it’s being slightly less comfortable than normal so you’re “on” more or if people you meet view you as “fresh meat.” Who knows, but I will virtually never pass up the chance to go to a party with friends in a place we’ve never hung out before because I know the chances of hooking up go through the roof.
It just dawned on me, the reason my success rate skyrockets is because these new, unsuspecting bumpkins have no idea of what I am capable. [Explicit and/or Suggestive Language Ahead. Stop HERE if you're under 18 or easily offended. By reading farther, you consent that you are over 18.]