Bringing March Madness to Soccer?

Gus Johnson is widely regarded as one of the best announcers in television. And when he’s paired with the incomparable Bill Raftery, the NCAA men’s basketball tournament becomes a little more special.

Thanks to YouTube user pbombz24, we can now know how Johnson and Raftery would sound calling the beautiful game. For instance, if the U.S. needed a last minute goal to advance from the group stage…

I still get chill-bumps watching that goal. The sound of Johnson and Raftery just make it even better. U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A!

USA v Slovenia Live Blog Tomorrow

Tomorrow at 9:30 am EST, EJSIC will be hosting a Live Blog of the USA v Slovenia game. Yours truly will be doing the majority of the commentating, but we want as many as possible to participate. If you do not know a thing about soccer, don’t worry. Join us regardless.

We will LOL at Slovenia’s futile attempt to defeat the mighty American football machine, chat about all of the World Cup happenings to date, and sing along in an e-version of “Ole ole ole ole.”

German Captain Michael Ballack out of World Cup

The captain of Germany’s World Cup unit has suffered an injury to his right ankle, and will miss the 2010 World Cup. This is a huge loss for the German squad, as Ballack is their stalwart leader who usually dominates the center of the field against any opponent. This is also a big deal for the US team. Germany sits in Group D with Serbia, Ghana, and Australia. This means that the US, in Group C with England, Algeria, and Slovenia, would draw a Group D qualifier in the knockout round (should they survive the group stage).

On paper, the US is the 2nd best team in their group, which means they would be poised to face the Group D winner in a knockout game. Germany minus Ballack has a tough task with a talented Serbian team and a motivated Ghana playing in the first African World Cup. However, they are still the best team in their group, with a mix of top talent and experience from the 2006 WC played on their soil. If they were to win the Group, and the US was to end up in 2nd in their Group, the two squads would face off with the loser going home. A Ballack-less Germany is an easier task than a Ballack-led Germany. And with the matches being played off the European continent, the US should be prepared to lay it all down and possibly reach the quarterfinal round again. Anything can happen from there…

24 days…

Russian commies at it again

Enter the world of Olympic figure skating (how is it that I keep writing about gay topics such as nude NBA players and now figure skating?) where Russian Evgeni Plushenko has returned us to the Cold War in an old fashioned USA vs Russia showdown. The commie called out American figure skater Evan Lysacek for not incorporating a “quad jump” into his routine.

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That's a commie if I've ever seen one.

America, we can just stand by and let this happen, figure skating or not. He’s calling out all of us. Figure skating may not be as masculine as football or John Wayne, but, by God, we are America and we don’t take smart-ass comments from anybody, especially a Russian.

So, channel your inner Colbert and be proud of the nation on Thursday night. Stand in your living rooms and cheer on Lysacek when he puts that commie down. U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A.

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

2010 Olympic game emblem

The Olympics start on February 12th and go until February 28th. Now, I really don’t care about 90% of the olympic games. They all kind of suck. I’m not even sure what they do in the winter besides hockey and skiing. Maybe figure skating, speed skating, or luging? For some reason, they do basketball in the summer. But, it seems appropriate to get everyone excited about cheering for America, the greatest country on Earth.

OK, I looked it up. Here’s the thing, there are a lot of different sports that are all pretty similar. For instance, skiing is a category that includes alpine, freestyle, and snowboarding. Likewise, luging is one part of “ice sports” that includes bobsledding and 6 other activities. So, now that we all accept that the Olympics suck for the most part, let’s talk about the only part of the winter olympics that is really enjoyable.

Olympic hockey is awesome! So, first the great news, hockey is shown on 94% of the days. The bad news. There is a day of Olympics that have no hockey. Just ski jumping. So, in my heart, hockey the Olympics doesn’t start until February 13th.

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